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Penance for teen mistakes June 22, 2010

I had one of those “events” last weekend – or should I say one of my kids had what I’m trying to lightly call a “teenage event”. That way I don’t freak out as much. There have been other events over the years but the things I put in this category are mistakes that the kids make that make me cry. Last weekend was one of those.

Since then, as a m-hmm good, uh used-to-be Catholic, I’ve been trying to think of ways to make up for it. This event was done in front of someone very important. So, I have this overwhelming urge to identify ideas for penance and to parade those in front of the adult who unfortunately witnessed my teens moment-ary lapse of reason.

My first thought when I heard about it was to put it in that top category – the ones that are so bad that we never talk about them again. That lasted all of about 5 minutes. I needed to do the dreaded “I’m so disappointed with you” conference. But, it wasn’t to punish by the dreaded parent lecture. It was to educate. It lasted about an hour and I thought it went well. If they only knew that it really does hurt us as much as it hurts them.

So today I found out that the “guilty” had decided to do a service project, recruited a friend, walked to the location, and did the service for 3 hours without looking for credit, advertising the good deed or otherwise. The only reason I found out was calling to see who was coming home for dinner. I thank G-d for this penance that was undertaken in a quiet and so meaningful way. I have this urge to share this story with the disappointed adult but I should be as humble as my child and enjoy the good deed for what it is and not as a bragging token. I’m proud.